Healing the Feeling of I’m Not Good Enough – I’m Not Worthy

I’m not good enough —  I’m not worthy

These are some of the most prolific thoughts I hear from clients. But there is no truth in the thought of not being good enough or worthy. It’s a false feedback loop from years of negative conditioning.

How do you quiet this feedback loop in your brain?

Most talk about the importance of “mindset” and practicing “positive thinking” to counteract the “negative thinking.”  It’s the “Daily Affirmation” method.

While this approach may work for some people, at least for a while, it may not be the best solution.

In my view, this is not sustainable. “Positive thoughts” are fine for what they are, and I’m sure practicing “being positive” has helped many move beyond their “negative thoughts”.

But here’s the challenge: 

Your mind thinks negative thoughts, and to combat that you bring “positive thoughts” back into your mind.  However, this is like engaging in a battle that takes energy and constant presence of mind. The issue is that thoughts are created by your mind and to some degree these thoughts are just fiction.

Of course, positive thinking can help with our “stories” and make us feel good. 

But what really matters is that thoughts give inspired action. Otherwise, what’s the point?

Positive and negative are the Yin Yang – the duality created in your mind!  You are trying to grow self-esteem through forcing yourself to think “everything is OK’, “I’m good enough.”

It’s exhausting!  And that’s a sure way to tune out inspiration.

Through positive thinking you are fighting fire with fire – fighting thoughts with different thoughts.

But, instead of battling negative thoughts with positive ones. The solution in a Daoist or Zen way is to be like water – simply flow around and through your monkey mind of thoughts and allow them to dissipate.

The answer isn’t to “fight fire with fire”, it’s about withdrawing oxygen and energy from the fire and allowing it to burn itself out.  

It’s more about having no thought. 

This means getting into a meditative state of “no-mind.”  This is called flow.  It’s more of a spiritual state. A state of mind where you and your thoughts have disappeared and stopped blocking you from new inspiration.

When you reach this state, even when a stray thought appears, you will be able to observe it as an impartial observer.  In this state of mind, you simply know, “Ahh, my mind is throwing a tantrum again, but that isn’t reality.”  And you move into the action you need to take.

Psychedelic therapy can bring you to this understanding in a special way.  In part it’s about ego dissolution wherein you begin to “listen” in a different way. When practicing no mind and flowing like water, it will eventually become effortless and your mind will give up and serve you.  So don’t allow your mind-child to enslave you with tantrums, let these thoughts go then take your rightful place as the master of your life and your creative calling.